Victim Mentality: Are Some People Addicted To Feeling Like A Victim?

By Oliver JR Cooper 

If someone sees themselves as an empowered human being, it means that they won't have a victim mentality. Likewise, if someone has a victim mentality, they won't see themselves as an empowered human being.

What this illustrates is that one can't be both; they are either one or the other. At the same time, even if one does see themselves as an empowered human being, it doesn't mean that they won't feel like a victim from time to time.

Back On Track

For example, something could take place in their life that wipes them out, with them feeling as though the world is against them. Still, it might not be long until they come to their senses and realise that this is not the case.

One could see this as just their mind playing tricks on them, and, as they are feeling a bit under the weather, it will have been easier for their mind to exert its influence. Like an intruder, it will have noticed an opening and pounced.

A Choice

Generally, they are going to believe that they are someone who has control over their life. There will be what they can do and there will be how they can respond to what happens to them.

In other words, even if one can't do anything to change something, they still have control over what takes place in their own head. This will stop them from getting sucked into things that are out of their control.

Emotional Experience

One may find that they have the tendency to feel not only empowered, but to also feel capable, at peace, connected, and grateful. Being thankful for what they have, as opposed to getting worked up about what they don't have or what is not going their way, will undoubtedly have a positive effect on their wellbeing.

It will also be a lot easier for other people to be around them; whereas if they had an entitlement mentality, it would be a different story. Their energy will be far more appealing to others as a result.

A Fulfilling Existence

Another benefit of living in this way is that one is going to have the right mentality to meet their needs and to achieve their goals. When it comes to their career, for instance, they may be doing something that is deeply rewarding.

This area of their like could be backed up by the relationships that they have with other people, with them having a number of people in their life who they can be themselves around. They may also be in intimate relationship with someone who they appreciate, or have been with someone like this not too long ago.

Another Reality

So, when someone has a victim mentality, it is not going to be possible for them to feel like an empowered human being. Or, if they do end up feeling empowered, it won't be long until they return to how they usually feel.
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In their eyes, the world, along with most of people in it, will be out to hold them back in any way that they can. As a result of this, there are likely to be a number of negative feelings that they are used to experiencing.

Emotional Experience

At times, they may feel angry, frustrated and full of rage, while at other times, they could feel powerless, helpless, and hopeless. When they feel angry and even rageful, they will most likely feel strong but, when they feel helpless, they will most likely feel weak.

There may even be times when they feel as though they are morally superior to others; as unlike others, they are not keeping anyone down in life. This might be the only way that they are able to experience positive feelings.

Held Back

Due to feeling as though they are being kept down by others, they could have an entitlement mentality. They are not going to be able to fulfil their needs and to achieve their goals because of these people, so these people will have a duty to give them things.

After all, it won't be as if one is choosing to experience life in this way; it is something that is out of their hands. And, what will prove this is how angry they are about how they are experiencing life.

Clear Resistance

If they were comfortable with what is taking place, and happy with not being able to fulfil their needs, they wouldn't be getting angry. However, even though part of them doesn't want to experience life in this way, it doesn't mean that a bigger part of them wants their life to change.

What they may find is that experiencing life in this way is what feels comfortable at a deeper level. Consciously, then, one will want their life to change but, unconsciously, this can be what feels safe.

A Closer Look

It might be hard for them to comprehend how feeling powerless and helpless, for instance, can feel safe; especially as its causing them lead a miserable existence and to experience so much pain. The thing about their ego is that it can end up feeling comfortable with anything; the only thing that matters is that it is familiar.

To this part of them, what is familiar is associated as what is safe, and, the reason why experiencing these feelings can be what feels safe, can be due to what took place at the beginning of their life. This may have been a time when they were abused and/or neglected, setting them up to gradually become emotionally attached to feeling this way.

Awareness

When one doesn't understand how what is taking place at a deeper level is influencing their life, it will be normal for them to feel like a victim. It will appear as though other people are victimising them, even though they are the ones who are victimising themselves.

If one can relate to this, and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by a therapist or healer.

Teacher, prolific writer, author, and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand nine hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.



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